Now and again, It feels refreshing to let go of my usual structured blog posts and embrace the freedom of sharing some thoughts from the week.
As I sat outside a café sipping on a cup of coffee on my own, I was reflecting on my recent trip to Jakarta, which had left me feeling like I had just stepped off the longest roller coaster ride: It was chaotic, hot, busy, vibrant and loud, but it was also heartwarming and hopeful, ultimately, we were there to be part of something sacred and pure, a family wedding.
The comedown from that trip and work commitments meant I had taken two weeks off from exercise; my body was feeling it after a 45-minute Pilates session, though in the back of my mind, I appreciated the recovery process would take less time now, after nine months of consistently (for me) working out, I had eventually reached a point where taking a break was not harmful to my progress, and it was in that moment I had revealed to myself, I can “be kind” to me, I don’t have to continue holding on to wild expectations, which then reinforces this defeatist narrative I would tell myself.
At that moment, I had eventually given myself some much-needed grace!!
At that moment, I had lost this horrid, overbearing sensation of being stagnant.
At that moment, I could finally acknowledge and see the growth I had made by doing the work: exercising regularly, seeing a therapist, reaching out to friends, having “real” conversations and writing; this blog is my creative outlet.
Being in a cycle of not-enoughness is no good for anyone and without a doubt, it has manifested itself in other parts of my being.
I am fully open to knowing I will forever be a work-in-progress; I’m not always going to get it right, and I am honestly grateful for all my life lessons.
Sending Love and Light to anyone struggling right now. The world may seem powerless and futile, “trust and believe I am feeling it right now”, but no matter what, we must always hold on to hope.
Love on your family, partners, children, friends, fur babies,
and most importantly,
Love on yourself x
A list of charities and organisations we can donate to: